Reflective Morning
Sitting on somewhat damp and cold wooden benches, I looked out across the field of green grass tipped with sparkling shards of morning dew. Sporadic growths of wild grass and weeds peppered the landscape, pushing through the damp earth, spreading out their leaves and clutching at the dim morning rays of sunshine. The morning chill’s bite caressed my face, leaving it tingling and ruddy with blood pumped from the inner coils of my core, pushing the cold away.
Remembering the madness that swept me up in its forceful grasp, I wondered what it would be like to fly away, leaving the events of this chaotic year behind. Turning over different images in my mind; the good, the bad, and the truly ugly moments ricocheted around, causing me to sigh audibly. I stared into the morning sun, praying that it would burn the darkness from my soul, as I searched for the answers to my own internal struggles.
A flutter of wings and the sharp cries of crows shook me from my thoughts, as I marked their wedge-shaped flight into the blue horizon. What would it be like to grow some wings and take off, climbing high into the sky, viewing the world from a safe distance? How would it feel to be away from all this and start anew?
“Hey there, what’s going on?” a voice called to me, breaking nature’s silence.
Looking over, I saw Anne walk toward me.
Putting a foot on the bench, I turned to watch her striding over. The interplay of her muscles made her gait sure-footed and easy; something to admire, but from a distance. There was nothing between us but friendship, but one couldn’t help but admire her athleticism. She was one of the more active girls at school, playing many sports and was a natural talent in almost anything she participated in. She was also a good friend of mine, who always spoke her mind.
“Not much, really,” I replied. “Just some things that I’ve been trying to sort out, after that whole incident with Jess and Andrew.”
Looking at me with a bit of concern, she hit me on the head with her binder, then plunked down on the bench beside me.
“Don’t go off and get into trouble again, you hear me?” she scolded.
Raising my eyebrow at her, I made a sound like a cross between a sigh and a scoff.
“Don’t worry so much. I’m not looking to put him into the hospital anymore. They can have each other for all I care,” I replied.
“Good, cause that little incident was one of the most retarded things you’ve ever done,” she said with a sense of finality, nodding to herself.
“So I saw your end of the year concert yesterday. You sounded good, even though she was your partner in that duet. Not sure how you kept it together, but you did.” She looked over and smiled at me, trying to be a good friend and reassure me that things would be ok.
“Yeah, I guess it was ok,” my thoughts drifting away from the present.
Memories of the concert were still quite fresh inside my mind, since it had only happened yesterday. It was the very last concert that I would ever participate in as an 8th grader, and I had to share the stage with the one who shattered me.
Getting onto that stage, mentally and emotionally intact, was one of the most difficult steps I had ever taken.
But it was something I had to do.
Part: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22.
